EKR Foundation

Grief is a natural process to death and dying.  It is not pathological in nature, but rather, is a necessary response to helping heal from the overwhelming sense of loss when a loved one dies.

It is important to understand grief as part of the human experience.  If you are grieving, some things you can do to help yourself include:

-Attending support groups in your area
Many communities have secular and faith based support groups focused on spousal,
parental, and child death.

-Therapy with a psychologist or other qualified mental health professional
Therapy can be helpful in many ways especially when combined with a support group.

-Journaling
Writing is a catharsis for many!

-Eating well
It is important to eat healthy foods and take supplements.

-Exercise
Take walks or work out: jog, aerobics or a spring-cleaning week will do as well. Physical exertion is a great stress reliever and may afford you some time alone to gather your thoughts in the process.

-Get enough rest
Give yourself plenty of time to rest. Grief drains your emotional battery and you will need to recharge more often. If you simply don’t want to get out of bed in those early stages of grief, then don’t!

-Reading and learning about death-related grief responses
Knowledge helps people regain a sense of control over their experiences and environment and helps reduce feelings of vulnerability.

-For some, seeking solace in the faith community
It can be helpful for some to seek the wisdom and comfort that churches, synagogues, temples, mosques, and other places of worship provide.

-Seek comforting rituals
This include funerals and memorial services, planting gardens and trees, donating to a cause, and other comforting and culturally appropriate ritual

-Allow emotions
Tears can be healing.

-Avoid major changes in residence, jobs, or marital status
Major changes can be too burdensome during grief.  Wait for about one year after the death of a loved one before making any major changes.

-Participate in the International Movement “The Kindness Project”

One of the most difficult losses to endure is the death of a child.  One of my books, “On Children and Death,” deals with this topic in a very helpful way. I highly recommend this book for bereaved parents.

Parents experiencing the death of a child can find great comfort in connecting with others who have also gone through that tragedy.

There are several support groups which provide this solace to families:

The MISS Foundation helps families experiencing stillbirth, infant, and toddler death and also provides
thanatological training for caregivers and public policy analyses.

The Compassionate Friends is a broad support organization .

Befrienders is an organization specific to suicide prevention and support.

Parents of Murdered Children focuses on those suffering from their child’s death as a result of homicide.

Some type of counseling or therapy may also be helpful to families experiencing child death.

It is important to realize that children mourn, too. Children may not express their feelings of loss in the same way as adults.  Here are some helpful resources for grieving children (Adobe Reader Required to View):

Helpful books for the Grieving Child:

• What Color is Death, Daddy? [PDF download]

An interactive book for children ages 3-7
• The Kaleidoscope of Grief: When Children Experience Death [PDF download]

Interactive books for Children ages 7 and up
• Kaleidoscope book En Español [PDF download]

A helpful brochures to help others understand how to help children

• Helping Grieving Children [PDF download]

Supporting the bereaved is a community responsibilty. Together, we can make a difference in the world!